Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

Moose A: What do you call a moose with diapers on its head? Moose B: Me.

How many blondes does it take to screw a lightbulb? There's too little information to come up with a reasonable answer.

You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

poop

What did the old man say? Im old

How do you get 1,000 dead babies into a car? Blender How do you get them out? Straw

-What do you say to a woman with Two Black eyes?. -Are you really that dumb to leave the kitchen twice -Elder High School

Periods are red, waffles are blue, some poems rhym, this one doesn't.

Have you ever had Ugandan food? Neither have they.

there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one being irish and the other chinese. now they both happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. so why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china, where as the chinese man had not committed any crime.

what starts with P and ends with u-b-e-s? Paul, can you brang me some priangles and the rest of my Rubik's cubes?

Why did Dom move to Wales? Because he is poor!

Two trains, on the same track, left different stations, and travelled in opposite directions. 74 people died.

A Quadriplegic walks into a bar.

What's worse than finding a holocaust in your apple? A worm.

What is just as important as Woman's Rights? Woman's Lefts, to maintain equality.

A cheeseburger and fries walk into a bar. The bartender says "sorry, we don't serve lunch"

How do you eat a candy cane? Shove it in your mouth and chew.

whats the same about a donkey and a horse? They are from the same animal classification group.

If pro- is good or favored and con- is bad, then why do people favor the constitution and stay away from prostitution?

Three old ladies were sitting on a bench. A man walks up and flashes them. The first old lady had a stroke. The second old lady had a stroke. The third old lady called 911 out of concern for her two friends.

A kid goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor! it hurts when I do this!" The Doctor says, "Well, because you have been diagnosed with ALD, and to make matters worse you are allergic to rapeseed oil" The child then cries because he will never live past 40 years old

whats worse than being out in the cold? Being on the sun.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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