Why am I writing this? Cuz I am eating babies alive right now!

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Roses are red, Violets are purple.

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Why did the chicken crose the rode? Because there was a 10 foot scorpion chaseing it

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Why did the boy find love? because if the girl did not love her he would kill her

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a potato a chicken and a rooster ate a cat and you just wasted your time

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what dyu call a bunch of white guys on a bench? the NBA

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"I saw daddy with mommy last night. I think he was stealing my milk."

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Two homosexuals are making love in the kitchen. One leaves for a bit and says, "Dont finish without me." Upon returning, white goo is spattered across the floor. Concerned that the clumsily dropped icing may stain, they promptly clean it.

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Why did Sara fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

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What walks like a duck, talks like a duck, and looks like a duck? Nothing. Ducks cannot speak, therefore this description negates all known living organisms.

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Where did Susie go during the bombings? Susie was wandering around the streets as she felt like she didn't know where she was any more. Everything was burnt to ashes. She came across a man who she has never met. He tells her to follow him. She did.Later, Susie, the mysterious man and a few other people with him were in a private meeting room. The mysterious man tells Susie that he was a Frenchman and he was with the resistance. A few minutes later, the bombs were dropping everywhere. The meeting room was destroyed and Susie, the Frenchman and his men were under attack. The French resistance were about to fight, but retreated - for they were French. Susie was left, lying there as she saw a bomb in the sky about to land on her. She tried to get up and run, but the bomb was too fast. It got her. So yeah. Susie went everywhere, like you lot said.

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Something told me to write "vote pancakes" so I wrote "Vote Pancakes" it said it was wrong, and now I know why, capitals.

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how do u make a plummer cry? Kill his children.... :)

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ROSES ARE RED VILOTS ARE BLUE I HOPE YOU KNOW IM A JEW

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What's an X-BOX? A box where you find a treasure

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what is red, white, and spins around real fast? a baby in a washing machine

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What's the difference between a lion and a stuffed lion? One is for children to play with, one will eat you alive.

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What's red and has zippers? Nothing, because watermelons can't physically drive without the help of a sheeps spinal cords ... DUH

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a man walks into a library Who the hell reads

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Why was the old man climbing the flag pole? Because he had Alzheimer, and he was losing his grasp of reality.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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let me tell u a dirty joke a guy fell in the mud.

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There's this Priest, a Rabbi and a Preacher talking about how similar they are.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot... are you racist?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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