Knock knock, Who's th- IMA FIRIN' MA LAZOR

thumb_up thumb_down +31

How do you make a clown cry? Kill his family

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Wanna hear something irrational? Pi

thumb_up thumb_down +31

If we had some ham, we could have ham and eggs; if we had some eggs.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Two jews walk into a bar. They drank beer and shot some pool and had a good time.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause he felt like it.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

what did the mother say to the banana? I'm going to eat you like your father.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

how do you stop santa from laughing? snap his neck.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What did Han Solo say to Chewy before they got in the Millennium Falcon? Chewy, get in the ship.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Tony Soprano walks into a diner

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not reply as it is a horse and horses cannot speak. The bartender realises his stupid mistake and calls the farm the horse came from. The horse is taken back to the farm and fed some hay. The bartender carries on living his life and then dies of natural causes at a very old age.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Whats the difference between a nigro and a nigro... They are both BLACK!

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What did the one battery say to the other? Nothing. Batteries can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A man walks into his room with a DVD and a box of kleenex. The DVD is a wedding video of his now dead wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Can a rabbit jump higher than a tree? Trees can't jump

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Whats the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?? The WheelChair

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How do you burn alot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What happens when you cross a Mexican and a Chinese man? A multiracial man.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A man walks into a bar. Oh, wait, no. It was a horse. So... A man walks into a horse

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Vacuum, purple, zebra.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What did the man say when he found a bar of soap in his mailbox? Why is there soap in my mailbox?

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why couldn't Sammy ride a Bicycle? -Because Sammy is a Fish

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops