why did the cow cross the road because he wanted to go to the mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove

Q: Why does the chicken cross the road? A: To get hit by a redneck.

Why did Jerald heat up pizza? Because he was hungry.

What did Hitler say to the Jewish boy? Nothing, Hitler died many years ago...

Why didn't the man go to work on Friday the 13th? Because he was unemployed.

Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

What's the hardest part about being a pedophile? Fitting in.

Why do cow say moo? Because you touch yourself at night

What is the reward for the pimp who banged a bitch? HIV

The Yak, a long-coated bovine found in the Himalayas, is named for its distinct call, which sounds similar to "yak-yak-yakyak".

Your mama so fat That she suffers from heart disease

Q: Why did the clown fall off the swing? A: He got hit by an axe.

Whats green and fluffy? Your mom.

If you throw a red stone in a blue lake what does it become? Simply a wet stone.

What is worse-losing your phone or failing school? Apartheid

Two muffins are in the oven. They don't say anything because muffins can't talk. The end.

Why'd the Squirrel fall out of the tree? Cause it was dead

What do you call a black doctor? Ehh...

What do you call a man with no arms and half an eye? Larry -Jack Sparrow

whats the difference between a ferrari in my garage, and a pile of dead babies in my garage. I do not have a ferrari but i do have a pile of dead babies

I'd love to submit an anti joke, but unfortunatley I don't own a computer.

how many dead babies can you fit into a bath tub i dont know i didnt get the chance to fill it up yet

What's the difference between a black man and a white man? The black man eats chicken.

A man approaches an attractive young woman at a party. He asks her if a rag smells like chloroform and proceeds to hold the rag up to her face. She passes out, the man takes her into a nearby bedroom and rapes her. He casually leaves the party. He will most likely continue this vile act for years to come.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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