what did the little boy say to the man? Nothing because earlier that day his mom reminded him not to talk to strangers

What's great about taking a shower with a twelve year old girl. Pulling her hair back and making her look like a six year old

A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

What do you call a child sitting alone in the back of a bus? Anti-social and on the verge of depression.

There once was a man from Peru, he couldn't fit into his shoe. He went to Brazil bought a big. Swallowed it and died.

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

Q: If Elvis was alive today, what would he crave the most? A: Brains. Moral: BRAAAAAAAAAAAINS!

roses are red violets are blue i have no money could i have some

my mom texted me telling me that my dog died... then she texted me the letters LOL... i texted back asking wat was funny!? she thought it ment 'lots of love' :p

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? a guy who copies antijokes on ant joke.com

what has wheels and runs on gas? a car with feet

What do you get when you run from Long Island to New Mexico? Tired.

What rhymes with car? Not kangaroo

Is this the Krusty Krab? No, this is an overused joke on a kid's cartoon. Thank me later.

Did you hear the joke about the vacuum? It sucks.

Q:what do you call someone who spends 7 hours a day playing video games? A: Someone who takes pride and joy from gaming

What do you call a shoe with no laces? Stilettos, sandals, flip flops, slippers, etc...

What do you call a shark on land A dead shark

I like trees. Trees hate you. Bye.

I like my coffee like my women, without a penis

what did the black, asian and jew have in common? Believe it or not, they all liked cantoulope.

masturbating on a tarc bus

Why was the man foolish for buying a new lamp? Because he lived in a small shack with no electricity and was probably going to die soon.

Whats the difference between a pizza and a baby? Humans don't eat babies, other than a Cannibals because some tend to eat babies.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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