A duck walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "What'll it be?" The duck says that he should get his doctor on the phone because his hullucinations are getting worse.

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when choosing a bedtime story.... jack the rippers life stories is not a good idea... ........................................................................

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It's good to be a scientist and great to be a biologist. However, it is never okay to be a scientologist.

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Q: Whats Worse Than 21 Dead Babies in a Trashbag? A: 1 Dead Baby In 21 Trashbags.

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What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

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So a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order some wine and have an enjoyable evening.

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Knock Knock Who's there? You You Who? Yes? Can I help you madam?

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Roses are red Violets are blue Faces like yours belong in the zoo Don't worry I'll be there too! Not in the cage But laughing at you! ??

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What does it take to shit in a shower?? To choke on a whambar and be 90 kgs!

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Why did Susie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't she catch herself? She had no legs. What did she get for Christmas? Cancer. What did she get for her birthday? Nothing, she died.

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. And that's when I found out my Uncle Ted was a cross-dresser.

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Why did Suzy have burns on her face? Because her little brother attacked her with a hot curling iron thinking it was a lightsaber.

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how do you call someone? use a phone

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i saw amango it splootered

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Why did the blond paint in the nude? because she couldn't find her clothes, and wanted to express her emotions through art

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Knock Knock Who's there? You have AIDS.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

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men's rights activists

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Wanna know a Chuck Norris fact? He is 72 years old and likely to die soon

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What did the five fingers say to the face? Nothing. Fingers cannot talk.

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What did the man say after falling off the bridge? Nothing. He died a painful and terrible death on impact.

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What is funny about civil and women's rights? Nothing, they are very serious matters.

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Knock Knock.. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Daves dead. This is Darrell.

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So, Helen Keller walked into a bar....and then a stool, and then a counter, and then a table....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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