A horse walks into a bar and begins to moo. Everyone is confused until it takes off its costume and reveals it's just a cow.

What's long and black? A 12 inch black dick.

It's raining, its pouring, the old man is snoring. He bumps his head, and is quickly rushed to the ER for serious head trauma

"Have you seen the food African kids eat?" "No.." "NEITHER HAVE THEY!!"

Knock knock. Who's there? Your mother. Please open the door. Your mother who? You were adopted.

When life gives you cancer, make cancer-aids.

knock knock whose there? banana? banana who? im sorry but you have to go to the doctor now.......

What did the German say to the Jew? Welcome to Germany we hope you enjoy your stay

What do you call a sober man driving a car? a designated driver

Why do we oftenly see african cry for nothing? Because this is the only way they get water.

Why did the man laugh? Because humans laugh when they hear a joke.

Why wouldn't Michael J. Fox make a good Sniper? Because he has no military experience.

What did the fridge say to the watermelon? Nothing.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Q)why couldn't the baby talk? A)the baby was dead.

"Is your fridge running?" "Yes, I believe so" "You'd better go make sure, because I put some chicken in there and it didn't seem very cold to me"

Did you hear the one about the guy who couldn't tell any funny jokes? He went to Anti Joke and posted 1000's.

A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

A Muslim walks into a bar. No-one survived the blast.

XD, I know I noticed myself, I was like "why the fuck did I post that shit?" Rellez XD okay sistah, I think I am just gonna get some sleep now, but Nero, is not Justin Bibble the first one?

Why did Hitler kill himself He saw his gas bill

Q. Whats blue and looks like a bucket? A. a blue bucket Q. whats green and looks like a bucket? A. a blue bucket in disguise.

What shouldn't you say to a dementia patient? You already said that.

Q: What's the worst part about having sex with a cougar? A: Dying...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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