why did the chicken cross the road? there was chicken food on the other side

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knock know. who there?.............. whose there?.........whose there!?!?! damn kids

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple?  Getting raped by a 10 foot scorpion.

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In an all out brawl between the casts of Gilligan's Island, Hogan's Heroes and the Brady Bunch, who would be the winner? The Viewer

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What's long, hard and full of semen? A penis

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A man said hello to a woman. He was italian...

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The teacher asked her class "What is 42 + 17?" Several hands were flung into the air. "71!" said Billy excitedly. "No, I'm sorry that is incorrect." said the teacher. "67!" shouted Carl at the top of his lungs. "Incorrect!" said the teacher. Then little Johnny raised his hand. "The answer is 69" he said full of intellectual delight. "Very good." said the teacher.

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What do you call a deer that has no eyes? I have no eyedeer

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What did Helen Keller say to her mother? Nothing coherent.

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there were 2 black men and a mexican man in a car. who as driving? we cant tell from the problem but is is more likely it is a black guy because there are 2 of him and 1 mexican.

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what's black, white, and red all over? A nun in a blender

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Julian Ha.

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What's the difference between an apple and a baby. An apple is a fruit. A baby is a human being.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Murder his family.

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Q: Why was the boy so sad? A: His parents were just killed in a car wreck, therefore orphaning him and his five brothers and sisters and leaving them with no money, food, or shelter due to lack of steady income and the fact that their house had been foreclosed on.

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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Why are fish so easy to weigh? Because usually they've been killed, stunned or sedated first.

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what do you get when you cross a broken arm and a broken leg? a broken head.

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What did the priest say to the young boy? Hi.

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What's worse then getting socks on Christmas? Being murdered by a bear.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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In Soviet Russia a lot of people were killed for voicing their opinion against Stalin

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What did the little Jew boy get for Christmas? nothing he is a Jew, he doesn't celebrate Christmas.

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Why did the little boy stop looking for his ball? Because he found it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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