What is white and flys at you from a tree? A refridgarator. I lied about the flying part.

Jew logic fail: Jew: We have endured suffering for thousands of years! Guy: And how old are you again? Jew: eight. Moral: If you see a goddamn moral in this one then post it yourself :P

What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

What happened to my sunglasses?

A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

Q: What's the worst part about having sex with a cougar? A: Dying...

why did tiarnan not ride hi bike to school today? Tiarnans dead

A blonde was very smart, and nobody made fun of her when she sometimes made small mistakes like every other person regardless of hair color.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because I hit her with a shovel.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer caught it.

what do you call a black man who bakes bread? a baker. you racist.

stephen hawking walks into a bar...

Why does the rabbit go in the hole? because that's where it lives.

What's the worst part of being raped by a unicorn? Being sentenced to a life of shame and humiliation.

What shouldn't you say to a dementia patient? You already said that.

What do you say when your hot chocolate is to hot? This hot chocolate is too hot.

Where is boots, Dora asks Why the hell are you asking me when your the one who is with him.

Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? He was dead.

What did the frat guy drink after he lifted? A various assortment of beverages that were chilled at a cool 66 degrees.

Why wasn't the black man served at the bar? Because they didn't serve his kind there... Did I say black guy? I meant to say a horse, wait, did I say bar? I meant the barn, yes, a horse walks into a barn but they couldn't serve him because he wasn't tamed

Q why did the girl scream A she got hit with an axe

I wish there were a city named Sample. So that the sign can say "Urine Sample"

shit is shit, even if you paint it purple; its still shit

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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