Why wouldn't joey pay attention in class? Because he was being raped by a grizzly bear.

What part of a vegetable are you not supposed to eat? His wheelchair.

Wow you look beautiful in that picture..... Let me see your tits. Sorry, I thought I was still texting.

How do you get a clown off of your property? You ask him politely to get off and if he doesn't, you should contact the authorities immediately.

Why did Jimmy fall of a building without a paracute? Because he lost a bet.

5 black men walk into a 7-11 at midnight. They clog the all of the toilets in the mens bathroom causing them to over run.

What did the penguin wearing a blue sweater say to the sink? I am a penguin wearing a blue sweater.

What is worse than the holocaust. A worm in MY apple!

What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I actually take my shoes off when I jump on the trampoline.

What breaks when you give it to a baby? Its pelvis

A black guy and a white guy both get pulled over by a cop for speeding. The white guy is promptly released with a stern warning, whle the black guy is thouroughly questioned and has his car searched for drugs, with the probable cause being that the black guy has bloodshot eyes, reeks of weed and has a bong in his frontseat.

"I see." said the blind man to his deaf son.

You know what topping goes bad with ice cream? Chloroform

Knock knock Fuck off!

What do u call something that's sticky and in a stick form? A glue stick :)

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

What do you call a yelling, enraged Asian man? A fucking asshole.

Why couldn't the color blind orphan find his apple? Because he was also blind.

Whats brown and sticky? Brown paint,

so a guy walks into a bar, he says nothing for he now has a concusion

How do you stop a plane? Land it.

Why can't Vampires go out in the sunlight? Because they don't exist.

two flowers in a meddow recently bloomed a cow came over and ate them, and the cow died of herpes the next day

Why was the little boy bald? Because he had leukaemia

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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