Why did the man read the terms of service? He had ignored them before, and was forced into a scam where a shady organization took all of his money and possessions. With no other way to provide for his family, the man began selling drugs, which led to several arrests. He has been n prison for 3 years now... His wife has left him for one of the man's close friends

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A blind man walks past a fish market then says "why hello lady's" ????

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How do you run faster than a cheetah? Cut off its legs.

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If you want to make the little things count, teach midgets maths!

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Roses are red, bushes are red, trees are red....i set your garden on fire.

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Why do turtles walk slow? They are physically incapable of walking fast.

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100% of the people who go to school die. What about the people who don't go to school? They die too.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

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What did the piece of macaroni say as they boy was about to eat him? Nothing. Foods are uneducated and illiterate therefore unable to speak, and went into the boy's mouth without a trouble.

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Why would a baby cry? Because it's being put through a juicer.

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Why did the pony say neigh? That`s all he can say

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A plumber walks into a bar and the bartender says "What will it be?" and the plumber says "no drinks thank you, I'm here to fix the toilet."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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mom and dad went into the bedroom after a long day at work the fell asleep

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Person 1: knock knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: nobody Person 2: nobody who? Person 1: ............

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What did the black guy, the Mexican guy, and the Chinese guy have for lunch? A sandwich

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to take three harpoons to the chest and still manage to feast on a family of baby seals...... Hi my name is Joey

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What is worse than throwing your baby in the river? Letting Moses out of Egypt

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what did jacob say to coach a joke

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Did you know that in Africa, every 60 seconds... A minute passes. So sad

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What is the french word for penis? I cannot say because I do not possess an adequate knowledge of the language.

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"Where are my shoes?" asked the man. "On your feet," I replied. "You are a paraplegic and have no feeling from the waist down."

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whats worse than drinking bad milk? tea bagging a bear trap

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Why didn't Pat's grandma go to his birthday party? Because she died last night

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops