Q: Whats Red And Has Socks? A: An Apple, I Lied About The Socks..

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A little boy is going to school when he is stopped by a stranger. The stranger tells the little boy, when his teacher asks him why he is late, just say willytop. The boy looks at the stranger oddly, but proceeds to go to school. He arrives 5 minutes late, and is teacher isn't that happy. His teacher asks him why he is late. All the boy says is Willytop. The teacher looks at him horrified, and sends him to the office. Well, the boy arrives in the principals office, and the principal asks him why he was sent down. All the boy said was Willtop. The Principal was so horrified that he expelled the boy from school. Well, the boy went home, to find his parents in the living. They told the boy they knew he was expelled, but they wanted to know why. All the boy said was Willytop. The parents were so horrified by this that they kicked him out of the house. Well, the boy is now walking to dark town streets, when he is stopped by a cop. The cop asks him why he is walking the streets alone. All the boy says is Willytop. The cop is so disgusted, that he kicks the boy out of town. Well, the boy is now sitting in a bar, and the bartender asks him why he is alone. All the boy said was Willytop. The bartender looked at him horrified, but before the bartender could say anything, the boy says "Please sir, I was kicked out of school, my house and even my hometown because of willytop. what does it mean sir?" The bartender nods, and tells the boy to come with him across the street, because if he tells him in the bar, the other people may get mad. Well, the boy and the bartender are across the street from the bar. The bartender opens his mouth, but before he could speak, a drunk driver hits them both.

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A priest and a Rabbi walk into a bar, but they're wearing normal people clothes, so no one notices or says anything funny.

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A horse walks into a bar... The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have testicular cancer........"

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whats worse than school...wait a minute?

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Why did the man with seasonal allergies not take his medication? He had liver disease...read the fine print

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A teacher, a consturction worker, and an army general are on an airplane. The pilot tells them the plane has too much weight, and if they don't each drop one item then the plane will crash. Realizing one item each is obviously not enough weight to throw off, the teacher and the construction worker team up and throw the army genral off the plane. They land safely, and live the rest of their life haunted by their vile actions.

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A chicken walks into McDonalds. He never comes out because he got grilled, greased, and seasoned.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because they're extinct.

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Q. What do mummies do when they run out of toilet paper? A. Nothing - they're dead and inanimate.

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why was the asian women such a bad driver? she was blind and had no arms

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What do you call a man with a horse? A man

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What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

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What's black and hanging on a tree in my backyard? Blackberries.

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there square amphibious wood gum flag homos CC

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So I was walking down the street the other day, I went to the shop.

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why was the blond so easy,because ALL blonds are whores.

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Ask me if I am a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

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How do you make a kid with ADHD stay still? Shoot him in the knee cap

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what do you get a man with no arms or legs for his birthday? a quick, painless death.

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Caramel Boing.

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why did the Cow die....? He didnt!!!!

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Why did the boy jump off the building? To get to the bottom.

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life is like a box of chocolates, it sucks if you have diabetes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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