what do you say to your girlfriend just after the best sex you ever had? I really got great value for money tonight with my prostitute sweety. You should have been there

Everyone is different, but there are two of me, therefore I am unique. I have 72 different personalities, which all think, act and behave the same, all have my same name, but its still different to have such a thing eh? No I am not asking, I just added that weird little lightbulb symbol after "eh". People buy my book, its full of this nonsense... Its named "Are you left winged, or wrong winged" The book that has nothing to do with politics, and everything to do with politicians non existent sexlife! (seriously I had a book signing today... It was weird, people like stood in line twenty Signatures... AND PEOPLE ARE ALL GOING "HEY ARE YOU THAT GUY FROM HORSEHEAD?" Nero -WHO THE FUCK! IS THAT GUY ON HORSEHEAD?

Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener.

What do chicken and babies have in common? They both taste like chicken.

justin beiber sucks

Why does Magic Johnson have to use extra-large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? A hurt animal that should promtly be taken to the RSPCA for surgery.

Q) What did the Irishman get for his birthday? A) Drunk

what do you call a black man flying an airplane a pilot, you racist

Are you the only 10 I see? Because I'm blind.

Little Timmy walks into an ice-cream store. He dies on impact.

Why did the 2 black kids jump the barb-wired fence To get to the other side

What do you call a orange BAD GRAMMER

What's black, white, and can't turn around in a phone booth? A nun with a javelin through her chest.

How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died

What is Dora the Explorer's favorite food? Pussy.

nick and a mexican were in a falling plane.. nick ate the mexican... that is all..

An American, a Canadian, and a Scottish man died in a horrible car accident. Their story was used as a lesson to keep teenagers from drunk driving.

can't you hear that TOOT Ta TOOT TOOT, TOOT Ta TOOT TOOT flute (nicki minaj in a past life listening to a symphony)

If you were on an island with one wish what would you wish for? To get off the island

I'm going as the joker for halloween

This episode featuring an all new nonspeaking character, who never goes on screen.

A wild Snorlax appeared crushing several members of the community

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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