Wanna hear a joke? Ruddell had sex.

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Just gonna stand there and watch me roar. But that's alright because I am a dinosaur.

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What do you call a latino with a limp? John...his name is John

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What do you call a a chinese abortion? My dinner

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If a large bear falls out of a tree, why would a giraffe also eat the cheese?

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telll someone to ask u if u are a tree then say nooooooo

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What did the asian boy's parents say when he came home with a report full of b-pluses? "You did well, but try harder next time."

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what do you call 2 walking Arabs with long beards? pedestrians.

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Is your refridgerator running? because if its not, you should probably have it looked at by a repair man,

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What do you call an alligator wearing a vest? An extremely talented reptile.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

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Mary had a little lamb. Then Died.

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What did the cow say when he saw his family get murdered? Moo.

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A dog was dying on the side of the road. I drove 50 meters ahead and saw it again. I was on shrooms.

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Two guys walk into a bar. But the third one was a duck.

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Whats the difference between Qantas and Malaysia Airlines? Qantas only looses money.

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Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he's working out.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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A guy wants to build his house out of bricks. So, he hires some experts and they build his house with bricks.

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God made rivers God made lakes God made you We all make misstakes

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A man entered ten puns into a pun contest, hoping that one of them would win. Unfortunately, he came in third place and was discouraged by his loss.

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Not even I believe you will ever know yourself that well ever Nero, you see what you created as a false illusion, as all of your, or rather our effort for nothing, as a pathetic attempt to create heaven on earth. In my eyes, you succeeded in doing so, and if it where for you, or more people such as yourself and I, it would have lasted, stop trying to give people what they do not deserve, and remember that making others happy will never cure the sadness and pain deep within you, only cover it. Stop fleeing from yourself, stay, get to know yourself.

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Why do birds fly South in the winter? Warmer, better food sources and therefore greater chance of survival.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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