A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

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A woman is in a terrible car crash. The husband comes in, runs to the doctor and he says "Doctor! My wife...is she going to make it?" The doctor turns and says "your wife will survive, but she's experienced heavy brain trauma. She will never walk again. You'll have to bathe her, feed her, change her diapers, and cater to her every need." The husband starts crying and says "oh my God that's terrible! Are you serious?" The doctor replies "Yes."

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Why was little Mat petting his dog? Just kidding his dog died in a house fire... so did little Mat

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A blonde, a redhead and a brunette were on an island. There were loads of other people too - the UK is a pretty popular place to live.

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roses are red violets are blue i have aids and so do you happy valentines day!

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What do George Washington, JFK and Hillary Clinton have in common? They've never been to my house.

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What do you call a black man that works with out pay? A volunteer

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What's worse than getting dumped? Heart Failure.

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The WNBA is on the cooking channel

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Why can't Larry drive? Larry's a rock.

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Where did the Smith family spend their weekend together? At the father's funeral.

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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb. One

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what's up? my penis.

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What's the similarities between a spoon and a duck. Both are not a lamp

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if bought jim bought 78 sweets and he eats 68 what does jim have left? diabetes

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Why didnt the guy knok on the door Because the door was open to begin with

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Knock Knock. Come in.

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What is grey and transparent? An elephant in a zip-lock bag.

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why did the kid struggle in school? because hes mentally retarted

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If we had some ham, we could have ham and eggs; if we had some eggs.

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You: Hey, I have a good knock knock joke, here, you start! -and if all goes well...- Them: Knock knock! You:Who's there? Them: Uhh...

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Knock knock Whos there? Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior jesus christ?

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Incorrect. Violets are violet. DERP!

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How do you put an elephant in a taxi? You open the door, make sure the elephant is seated confortably, and close the door.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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