What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot, racist.

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Whats worse than Sandy Hook Massacre? 9/11

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Three dogs are barking at a wall. People walk by thinking "Why are these dogs barking at a wall?".

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what is the difference beyween football and baseball the superbowl and world series

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Q: What does Harry Potter say when he answers the phone? A: "No, she's dead. This is her son."

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I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

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So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

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What did the man say to the woman before he had sex with her? "May I have sex with you, please?"

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What did ahmet say to adem...? LEMME SUCK ON THOSE TITS joke made by dark

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knock knok Who's there The police, I regret to inform you your son was killed in a horrific traffic accident

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Jersey Shore.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 ? Because 6 was registered as a sex offender

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A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

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Next time someone says "I have mad money"... Say "whys it mad"

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Your mum's so fat, she should probably consult her local GP to insure she doesn't die of a cardiac arrest.

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is this the krusty krab? no, this is patrick.

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Have you seen the blind man's new house? No. Neither has he.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Trash gets dumped Just like you

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Two tomatoes where crossing the road, when one of them barely avoided being run over. The other said, come on tomato!

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this is an anti joke so it has no punch line :D

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An alien spacecraft picks up human transmissions from Earth. They continue on in silence and disgust.

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What is the difference between a pig and a crow? One is a animal that Is butchered to be eaten as a wonderful meat product. And the other is a pretentious asshole bird that no one likes.

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Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

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Heads or tails? Heads. Sorry, I'm fresh out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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