Yo mama's so fat, that when she jumped, gravity pushed her back to the floor!

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A man sees another man sitting on a bench with a pickle in his ear. He asks the man "Why do you have a pickle in your ear?" The other man replies "What? I couldn't hear you because I have a pickle in my ear."

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Why did the small child cry? He was forced to dig his own grave at gunpoint.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He had escaped from his farm and didn't understand the laws of jaywalking.

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what does matt daly like to do in his free time anal

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A teacher at a school in America is writing on a chalk board. He asks the class what 50 - 20 is. The teacher begins to become impatient when noone put their hands up. This is because the school is an educational facility for asylumn seekers from Rwanda and all of their hands were cut off by a Warlord.

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What do you get when you cross a turtle and a platypus? Well, I don't think it's genetically possible by nature, but Turtpus is a pretty funny name.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nick Oh hi Nick come in

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

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Jack and Jeff went up a hill to fetch a pail of water, They both turned gay, and had some sex, and now they have HIV

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Q. If you have 4 pencils and I have 7 apples, how many pancakes can we fit on the roof? A. Purple because aliens don't wear hats.

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What is the #1 cause of pedophiles? Sexy children

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xCh3wyy is the biggest fail in the entire universe. If you head to www.youtube.com/xxch3wyyxx You will see how much he fails. Please dislike his horrible video and tell him to suck a prick.

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what did the white man say to the mexican man when the mexican stepped in poop? you have poop on your toe

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What is the hardest thing about eating a vegetable? the wheelchair

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Knock knock! Who's there? Bob Hi bob, come inside. And next time just use the doorbell

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How did the black person die? Of old age

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What do you call an asian who celebrates Christmas? A christan

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What happened to the alcoholic? He got liver cancer

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Don't you hate it when you have 5 dead bodies, and you don't know which one to shoot your load on? -no

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What's Hitler's favorite beverage? Soda! Not Juice (jews) you asshat!

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

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Q. What did the gay kid say to his group of straights? A. 10 dollars to the first one to tip over that little asian boy on the bike.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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