What's black and blue and hates sex? The ten year old in my trunk

why did the boat crash? a tomato was driving

Hey I just banged you, and it was crazy, delete my number, and keep the baby.

Nah really, I start giggling like a dork whenever weird porn or whatever shows up on my computer, its just too weird. Fine ill use my glasses then, thanks for the comment by the way, I was really regretful for sending you that pic, but then again I did not have contacts then, nor did I want to photoshop anything.

Why did Sally drop her Ice Cream Cone? Because her dog licked her butthole.

Double-whammy

Why did the kid get on the bus. Because he had to go home

A priest and rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender was incredibly biased towards religion and had the rabbi removed.

Britney got to the top of the building. What did she do next? She jumped off to end her miserable life

Religion.

If the human population held hands around around the equator A significant portion of them would drown.

What's a dead baby look like? I don't know, I don't fap with my eyes open.

A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. You think they should have ducked?

Whats a dogs favorite thing to eat? Food.

There is a mom a dad and a son, they walk into the museum and the dad is in the bathroom.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

What's worse than being fired? Eating a bucket of diarrhea.

What's black and white and red all over? I don't care I have AIDS

Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, Jack sat on his candle, and burnt his ass.

What did the rug say to the floor? I got you covered

Why do black people like Black Friday? They can get fairly expensive appliances for a very reasonable price.

why did the clown go to the graveyard? because he was dead

Why did Emily fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Emily.

What did Stephen Hawking say to a prostitute? Push me, and then just touch me, Till I can get my, Satisfaction.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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