I have magical powers. Try your best to not to follow these instructions: Ready? Go. You are now blinking your eyes. (strike 1) You are now breathing voluntary. (strike 2) You suddenly have an itch somewhere on your body. (strike 3) You lost. Thanks for playing my little game. Hope you enjoy thinking of a flying pink elephant with wings.

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You're so black that other black people make fun of how black you are.

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how do you kill a blonde?? put a scratch n sniff on the bottom of a pool

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Why don't black people listen to country music Because every time they here hoe down the think there wife just got shot No sorry for anybody who's black I luv ya don't think twice I have thirty blk friends

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What do you call a man with an eight foot steel spike wedged in his rectum? An Ambulance

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What does Osama Bin Laden and the typical Western man have in common? Extensively modern p.o.r.n-o collections.

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Whats black and white and says moo? A Dalmatian retriever with a voice box.

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Why was the black child found dead in water? He was raped and thrown into a river.

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What does the kid with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A: arms and legs

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roses are red violets are blue i like movies get me a taco

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What's green and has wheels? Grass i was lying about the wheels.

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What do you call a bunch of whiteguys running down a hill? An Avalanche What do you call a bunch of black guys running down a hill? A Mudslide What do you call a bunch of mexicans running down a hill? A Jailbreak

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A man once had a monkey, and it made him very happy. then one day, his monkey ran away. So the man was very sad and screamed, "I knew i should have broken the monkey's legs!!"

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What do you call a man having sex with his own mother. - Gross.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk in to a barber shop They each ask the barber for haircuts of their preference.

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Why couldn't the blonde have children? She had pelvic inflammatory disease.

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what do you call 4 black people pushing a car uphill? unfortunate

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Knock knock! Who's there? Me.

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What's in a bag of dead babies? Dead babies and one alive baby eating it's way out.

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What to hear an anti-joke? No.

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What did the black guy get on the SATs? Who knows, that isn't a specific person

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A man sets his house on fire. His wife comes home, what did she ask? Why'd you set the house on fire?

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What did the Shark attack victim say just before she died from her injuries? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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A white man walks into a bar. He orders an alcoholic beverage, and thinks to himself, " that made me feel a lot better. He drives home in his Cadillac and takes a nice sleep until 7am, when he is supposed to work. He is an architect.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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