Hellen Keller walks into a bar. And a tree. And a lamp.

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What do you call a man who is walking into walls and poles? A blind man who really needs your help.

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A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

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God is like semen. They're both nouns.

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Mel Gibson and a Jew walk into a bar They proceed to have a pleasant conversation and both take taxis home

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Why don't women drive more? Because statistically the man offers to drive more frequently

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Little goldy locks was walking through a forest and stumbled across a nice cabin. She went inside and ate some newly made porridge and slept on the various beds that were there. The owners of the house came back from a stroll of their own and sued her for breaking and entering.

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-I have an idea! Let's play twenty questions! -Alright! But i have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

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Did you here about the Asian couple who had a stupid baby? They named him Sum Ting Wong

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why can't James swim at 2010 summer ? because james died at 2009

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Legal Mexicans in Texas

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Q: why did the black man kill the white man? A: he was clinically depressed, mentally unstable, and had a grudge against the white man that had nothing to do with his race.

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Math Quiz! If sally was born on September 18th, 1997, how old will she be on her birthday? Leave your answers on her grave tomorrow.

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A horse walks into a bar. Realizing the severity of the situation, the bartender heads toward the exit... stumbling over a chair.

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Transgenders! More than meets the eye! Transgenders! Girl was once a guy! LGBTs wage the battle to destroy The homophobic forces of Christianity! Transgenders! Homos in disguise!

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Why did the kid get on the bus. Because he had to go home

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Why did the white man beat the black man in a fight? The white man was bigger. Also, he was a black belt in Brazillian Jiu Jitsu.

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A woman asked me today if I'd ever tried crazy golf. I hadn't actually ever tried it.... So I replied "no".

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Roses are red, violets are blue, some people are gay, and so are you

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Where did Sarah go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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Why is water clear? Because it doesn't have a pigmentation.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Knock, Knock. Who's there? The Chicken.

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How do u know what a ass is. You no once you meet adam mac.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Jews are human beings. Pizza is a type of food.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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