Why did the man with seasonal allergies not take his medication? He had liver disease...read the fine print

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what's pink and fluffy? pink fluff

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because this chicken had a mental disability and saw on the news that there was a hospital on the other side of the road that could treat his illness and possibly save his life, allowing him to fulfill his life-long dream of retirement. But knowing that chickens do not possess the brain power capable of understanding the situation that this chicken was in, it had probably gotten lost and just wandered off.

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why didn't Lebron James give me a fourth quarter?...he forgot his wallet at home and didn't have any spare change.

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who is 2 chainz? no one 2 chains is just 2 chains. spelled with an "s" not a "z"

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Why couldn't the woman drive? She was dead.

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A father and son are involved in a car crash. The father is killed, sadly, but the boy is rushed to the hospital. The doctor prepares for surgery, and since this boy has no family-connections to her, she performs successful surgery on him, and the boy goes home after 3-5 days.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Chickens live on farms.

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life is like a box of chocolates... it doesnt last long for fat peopl

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where do you hide a black mans paycheck? somewhere he would never find it

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Yo Mama is so stupid, she believes in God. While her faith has absolutely nothing to do with her intelligence and in 2014 only the most bigoted and stupid people would demean people based on their religion,she does have an IQ of 65 and is therefore believed to be mentally inadequate. It's really quite sad.

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Q: What did little Jimmy get his grandfather for Christmas? A: Nothing his grandfather died on Thanksgiving

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Even better if I am not here in an hour, lets make it two huh?, I was thinking about you, sleep is well, not something I prioritize well enough at all, probably why I am so adrenaline crazy.

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Jimmy comes home from school one day and goes to his mother. "Mommy, guess what?" "What?" "I had sex with my teacher today!" Naturally after hearing such news the mother gets appalled and tells her husband. "Well, that's my boy" he says "Now that your a man Jimmy we're going to go out and get some drinks tonight be ready in a half an hour." So they arrive at the local bar "Wait here son, you can sit down and save us a table and I'll go get the drinks ok?" "No dad I think I'll stand" "..why? What's the matter son?" "My butt hurts"

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A frog walks into a bar and the bartender thinks he is very well evolved because frogs don't walk they hop

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What do you get when you cross a lamb and a pigeon? You get your house taken away.

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i know the best knock knock joke! you start! other person: knock knock me: whos there ........

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How many gays does it take to change a light bulb? 1, even if hes not happy im sure he would still be able to change it.

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What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy?

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What do Sandusky and micheal Jackson have in common? They are both white.

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Roses are red, Violets are Violate and not fucking blue.

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Why does the easter bunny hide his eggs? Because he wants to hide the fact he knocked up a chicken.

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A janitor walks into a bar. He cleans the bar.

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Whats brown, sweet, and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops