Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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::ring::ring::ring:: Hello? Is your refrigerator running? Yes, yes it does! Why? I work for a local home appliance superstore and we are having a special on repairs and maintenance. Would you like to try our home appliance maintenance offer? I'm sorry no! I do not actually have a refrigerator. I only have a cooler. Bye! ::the man shuts off his cell phone and sets it on top of his styro-foam cooler as he mumbles to himself alone while on his boat, "Darn advertisement offers!" and continues to fish in the middle of the lake::

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A guy watches a porno. When it is over, he said; "Wow, that was deep"

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Q: How do you find the population of Mexico? A: Take a census

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There's two blondes a black man and a camera man...

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

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What do you do when you see a person sleeping at a bus stop? You fart on their head

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How did the blonde girl fall down? She didnt see where she was goin

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Why can't Ray Charles read? Because he's Black

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What's worse than finding an apple in your worm? Lebron traveled

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What did the Jewish kid get for Christmas? Nothing, Jews don't celebrate Christmas.

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What do you call two black men flying an airplane? Pilots.

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A giraffe walks into a bar and the bar tender asks "Why the long face?!" to witch he replied " I've just been mugged outside.".

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Q: what did the black man say after the white man said knock knock A: who's there

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What do you call a group of black guys riding on horseback? You don't. You call the cops first.

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What happens if a black person meets a white person? They shake hands

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Why did The Chicken cross The Road? The Chicken was a new drug dealer to town and he did a deal with The Road , the town's existing drug dealer (they used these nicknames to hide their identities), but then back stabbed him to try and take the whole area for himself. Money and Power, as always.

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96

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What is the biggest lie in the entire universe? " I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

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its all shi.ts and giggles.... ......until someone giggles and s.hits

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What did the black guy say to the white guy? The black guy said, "hello". They then proceeded to have a normal conversation.

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Why doesnt the chicken wear any pants? His pecker is on his head

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why did the chicken cross the road? he didnt.. that kinda shit never happens

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what do you do when you see a black man punching a girl? act like you dont see it and get the hell out of harms way

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops