Why is the boy home alone on Friday night? Because HItler took he's parents away.

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Why did the clown drink all the sweet wine? Because he was an alcoholic.

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Why did the burrito taste bad? It's a giraffe.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt, it got stuck at a red light, it waited 5 minutes before getting frustrated and leaving. Later that day the chicken realized that it had forgotten to press the button.

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What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are the same.

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why was the black man running away from the convenient store? He was going for a jog and it just so happened that he passed by the store

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way do Japan bomb pearl harbor because America hat sex with China [watch Hetalia]

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Its not a big mistake at all, if people do not want to get hypnotized you cant hypnotize them, or so I thought...

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how do you kill a blond? give her a gun and tell her it a blow dryer

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What did the deaf blonde say to the brunette? Nothing.

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A Rabbi walks into a bar. He does not order any alcoholic beverages, because Orthodox Jews aren't allowed to consume alcohol except for certain times and religious customs.

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Roses are red. Violets are violet.

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A racist man walks into an all black church. He has no problem with the people there as he is a black man who hates caucasion people.

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what's worse than finding 8 dead babies in 1 trash can?....... 1 dead baby in 8 trash cans.

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How are grapes and squirrels similar? They're both purple. Except for the squirrel.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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What do you do when you're surrounded by 15 vampires and 15 werewolves? Stop pretending.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, seeing as the slaughterhouse was directly across the road from the farm where the chicken lived, the man who owned the farm led his flock of chickens across the street when they were of age and fattened up so that they could be inhumanly massacred in order to process an order of chicken nuggets.

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Why do black people like bananas? Because bananas have potassium which therefore gives them bigger muscles, which is why they excel at every sport we white people suck at.

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What do Michael Jackson and most Catholic priests have in common? They're dead.

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-Why didn't a girl cry after she fell down with her bike? -Because a handlebar pinned her lung.

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Why did the cow cross the road? Because he escaped the farm and didn't know what else to do.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

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What do Whitney Houston and MTV have in common? They both REALLY died in the 90's.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops