Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you suck your own dick.

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Q: How do you kill a Brazilian Blind Electric Ray? A: Killing endangered species is a crime.

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Who visits Satan on Christmas? A dyslexic box.

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Why was the Mexican stopped at the border? He forgot his passport.

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What did one muffin say to the other? I'm baked... just kidding muffins are food and therefore can not speak

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What is the best part about having sex with tweny-six year olds. There are twenty of them. ap~pac

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Starving.

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Q:Why are babies and spaghetti alike? A:They both stick to the wall when cooked.

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Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

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even a blind squirrel finds a nut every now and then. but has a high probability of getting hit by a car and slowly dying from crushed limbs

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How do you call a black person in KFC? By a Phone.

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What do you call a Muslim flying an airplane? A pilot, what did you think it was? F**king Racist dumbass

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Duncan walks into a bar and is greeted by his friends Eric and Tom. Duncan tells them that his wife left and took the kids. Duncan then goes home and hangs himself.

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Why is paper white? Cause that's how they make paper.

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Q: what do you call the green and the (stone eater) animal? A:the green and the (stone eater) animal

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How do you stop birds from building nests in your grill? You turn the grill on

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my friend got in a car wreck,he lost his left arm and left leg. how is he now? Hes all right.

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1.....2.....3.....boom you died

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Why did the school fall? Because a hurricane hit.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "James" "James who?" "What the heck?You forgot me already?Its your bestfriend dude.Now let me in." ~Lil

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Which way do 4 gay guys walk South then past the milkbar then around the corner

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Why did sally drop her drink? Because she was hit by a bus. Knock Knock. "whos there?" Not sally.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops