CAVE JOHNSON.

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"To tea to to to" -- russian tourist, asking for two tea to room 22. (DOKA)

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Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? He's dead.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse then says nothing because horses cannot talk, only humans can talk.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She is a woman ... Who is blind, deaf and mute Therefore considered a danger to herself And those around her.

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A seal walks into a club.

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You're Mom is Dead She was killed by a Grammer Nazi for me misspelling Your

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What did the faggot say? Nothing, he shot himself due to high school bullying and rejecting parents.

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Whos worse than Akise Teague. Mike Vick

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A girl asks a Croatian bartender for a beer, the bartender replies, 'There is no beer in this bar.'

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What is the best way to burn Jews Light them on fire

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SQUID DOMINATION!!! Squids WILL Take Over the World!!!

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why did the black man sit in the back of the bus? becouse all the seat where taken in the front

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What did the limp dick say to the vagina? Sorry, I'm a poof.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. Open up. We have a warrant for your arrest.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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What is brown, white, and red all over? A part asian part white guy covered in blood after having her girlfriend have her period while they were having sex in a club in alaska near a military school that was abandoned and is now haunted but justin bieber took care of that.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why are you worrying about the chicken? You just got shot.

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What did god say when he saw the first black person? He will do alright for him self

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i black man walks in to a bar.he askes if he can make out with you? the man says"no. black man says"why? the guy says"because im not homersexal. black man says"oh. boss says"hey i told you dont talk to black people. guy says"no i can ekplan.boss says no more of buts or buy. boss says" you are fired guy says"NO! boss says"yup both of you get out! guys say no two guards come to talk them out. THE END`DONE!

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Why did the Mexican sneak across the US border? There aren't many good jobs for him in Mexico, and with the low cost of living in his small village, he will be able to provide for his entire family of seven on just minimum wage in California. He will miss his family terribly while he is away from them, but he believes it is worth it in the end. Once he saves enough, he will pay the coyotes to smuggle the rest of his family over so they can be together again. Hopefully none of them will die on the journey.

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What are the two words that once you hear, You will feel a sudden gush of euphoria followed by immense depression? The Game

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whats the same about a red crayon and a blue crayon? there both the same color except for the blue one

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Chuck Norris and Bane recently had a fight on a bet. The result was Bane won easily as he is the much bigger and stronger man, and Chuck Norris lacks the skills he once possessed as a younger man as he is now 72 years old.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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