Its a sunny day. There's a tree and a bird. What did they say to each other? --------------------------------------------------- Nothing they can't talk.

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guess what? i dont know, what? i dont know either, i thought you knew.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? ....Mrs Murray silently returned to her armchair, a single tear rolling down her weathered cheek. Her lonely existence deepened, as she realised the gang of boys had fooled her again.

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why did little johnny start choking? because somebody shoved a bag down his throat

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little miss muffit sat on her tuffit eating her curds and weigh along came a spider and sat down beside her and said hey whats in the bowl?

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Why do giraffes have long necks? To connect their bodies to their heads.

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Q. What is worse than a worm in your apple? A. Hitler

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Women's Rights Movement

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Roses are dead Violets are too Were all gonna die So are you.

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knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

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Why did the man laugh as he sat in the electric chair? He was being tickled by the guard.

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What did the blonde say to the other blonde? "Hey, do you want to get something to eat?"

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What did the deaf girl get for Christmas? Nothing, she was Jewish

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Why is the fat kid on the ground crying? Because I hit him with a shovel

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Why are Asian people bad drivers? Coincidental cases of blurred vision.

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Why Did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him

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What do get when you mix cancer and a bike? Lance Armstrong

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Why Cant michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he is dying of Parkinson's disease.

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your brother so fine that hes skinney

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420

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What did the guy say to the campgrounds? It was in tents (get it like intense but it is a pun)

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What's white and can't jump? A fridge.

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Q: My hands are queefing vaginas A: Milk isn't wearing underwears

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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