Around 10PM on a Saturday two Irishmen walk into a bar. They order up a round of drinks, and comment on the appearance of several women in the place whom they believe to be single. After finishing up their drinks, the one Irishman asks the other if he'd like another one. The other says no, that he promised his wife he'd be back soon with diapers for the baby. He thanks his friend for the drink and leaves for home. The remaining Irishman orders up another "round" from the bartender, but really it's only one drink he is ordering, being he is only one person.

What do you call a man running around town with no clothes on? Naked.

What did the cow say to the other cow? "Baaa", he had an identity crisis.

whats sad about 4 black people in a cadalic fallign over a cliff? it wasnt there car

Q- what do you call a Jew swimming in the Antarctic? A- Dead, any man wouldn't survive swimming in water that cold

How do you make 5 lbs of fat look good? Draw a smiley face on it.

What would happen if an unstoppable object hit and unmovable object? I don't know, I was just wondering

I got pussies, cocks, asses and bitches. In my animal store.

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Does it really matter?

A tiger walks into bar. He orders a drink and leaves. The tiger's name was Tony the tiger," It was just a man wearing a costume for the cereal company.

What do you call a dear with no eyes? A no-idear

What color do you wear if you're in the NAVY? Beige, white, sometimes camouflage - really, it depends on your rank and the situation.

''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''

What do you say to a disabled man in a lift? Have a nice day.

Knock knock Who's there Your Mother Come in

Your mom is so fat she decided to get out of bed and exercise because she realized her health would become serious and wanted ot do something about it.

What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after his operation.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody because a pineapple is not a proper home

Two friends are sitting on a couch watching TV. One friend accidently turned on a pornography channel. The other friend felt awkward and went home.

Why Do cats purr when you pet them? I'm actually asking a question there I don't know why.

Why are female badgers more attracted to the smell of cheese than male badgers? I don't know. Ask Bill Snodgrass

What african eat for christmas Sand.

What is 33 + 1? Penis

Why was the penguin popular? He cuts himself.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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