a kid was born with down syndrome on christmas night

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what did the food critic say when he was handed a snickers? I'm allergic to peanut butter

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ADAM SAS IS A GREAT GUY!

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What did Helen Keller say to her friend? Nothing. If you didn't know, she was deaf and blind so she had to use Sign Language.

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? One. Unless she's particularly short, then she may need to get a friend, who may or may not be blonde, to help by holding the ladder.

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why cant little timmy ski? he was born without legs.

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why did the boy die? because he got shot

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a chicken and was probably not aware that it was walking across a road at all, especially considering that it was likely in a low-traffic rural area.

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2 men walk into a bar, the 3rd man ducks and ask them if they're ok

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Q: what's white on the top and black on the bottom? A: Society

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An Indian lady is pushing her child down a footpath in a stroller whilst leading her dog. A refridgerator lands on the mother. Why did the Chinese man behind her cry? Because loss of life is a frantic event and having witnessed such an event he was deeply shocked. He was also sad that no dogs were killed. This is because a dog killed his wife in a freak accident and he has held a grudge against the species ever since.

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Why did the gir fall off of the swing? She had no arms.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar They are friends and continue to have a pleasant evening

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A man walks into a bar. Another man becomes the Limbo State Champion.

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What's faster than a black man carrying your TV? The law enforcement that promptly catches him and is about to charges him with theft regardless of his ethnicity because stealing someone else's property is just generally an unlawful thing to do.

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roses are red tulips are too, violets are violet, not freaking blue.

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? Hit her in the face with a ax!

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no

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How many fish does it take to brush their teeth? Jp's worth of fish isn't enough.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He orders a drink without making any grammatical errors.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

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if yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too. Cna yuo raed tihs?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? I was asking you...

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How do you stop a baby from crying? Slit its throat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops