What's cold, tired, wet, and starving? A girl up at 4:00 am that just came out of a cold shower.

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What's funnier than a joke book? 2 joke books.

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Two peanuts were walking down the street, one was assaulted, the other was brutally raped.

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What is brown and woody? Brown wood.

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Why didnt santa leave presents under the tree? Because santa doesnt exist.

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What did the black guy say when after he jumped in the pool? Wow, its kinda chilly.

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A man in a state penitentiary drops his soap. He then picks it up and continues his shower.

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Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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Guest what? Dog

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What's worse than being eaten by a giant bear? Hitler.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

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Hitler wasn't such a bad guy. He did kill Hitler.

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Knock knock! Who's there? F*ck. F*ck who? F*ck you.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a Muslim? Their religion.

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Chuck Norris never shows emotion!!!... because he is a pragmatic person and thinks in a more logical manner.

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Have you heard the one of the two headed man an the horse? Neither have I

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Why did the Japanese boy drop his sushi? He was hit by a tsunami

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Na na na na na Neo! Na na na na na na 'Sporin!

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TELL

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whats worse than a 6 dead babies in a dumpster? You were babysitting them.

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What did the church say to the house? You need jesus

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy launched a flare. Nobody came.

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Your dad is so hairy, that he shaves to look more cleanly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops