rabbits running in my bathroom!

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who's yellow , and looks like a bear? pudsey

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"Did you fall from heaven?...Cause your face is really messed up."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause he felt like it.

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Ask me if I'm a tree I don't need to, because I know you're not a tree

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Yo mama is so fat that she is in a diet and wants to lose weight by eating healthy.

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A young farmers cow died in an oil burning, The farmer then said to his son; you get the milk ill get the shovel

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What did the drunk man say to his wife? "I love you, Honey"

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Penis

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Why wouldn't anyone want Helen Kellers dog? It's been buried for a long time...

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What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's white and sticky? A stick painted white.

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot!

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Why is my penis so small? No, seriously, can anyone tell me?

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A dog walks into a bar, followed by his blind owner.

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Why did the girl blush when she opened the fridge? Because she saw the salad dressing

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Mommy, why did daddy leave? Because you touch yourself at night sweetie.

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A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

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How did the lazy fat boy burn a lot of calories? He set his fat friend of fire.

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Yo mama is so poor I saw her kicking a can down the street and asked her what she was doing? Her reply was: Kicking a can down the street. What did you think she was doing? Moving?

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Well judging by the fact that there's no actual door in between us I'm pretty sure you can decide who it is.." "'Well judging by the fact that there's no actual door in between us I'm pretty sure you can decide who it is' who?"

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not reply as it is a horse and horses cannot speak. The bartender realises his stupid mistake and calls the farm the horse came from. The horse is taken back to the farm and fed some hay. The bartender carries on living his life and then dies of natural causes at a very old age.

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When is a door not a door? When your house burns down.

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What happened to jimmy when he stepped on a rusty nail? He died of of tetanus.

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A man and a bird are on the edge of a cliff. The man falls off and dies and the bird flies away because birds can fly and people can't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops