—Conversation started today— My God, why have you forsaken me? Seen 6:00 PM

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A man lying in bed at night rolls over and starts rubbing his wife's back. She says, "Not tonight, honey, I have a headache." Her husband respected her wishes and went to sleep.

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When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

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What do you call a man with no arms? Disabled... some people can be so cruel.

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So a jew walks into a bar!

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A duck walks into the bar, buys a beer, steals your woman, wins a bar fight, pistol whips a police officer, departs and shouts Aflac

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Correctional officer asks an inmate. "Does your elevator go all the way up"? Inmate replied. I don't know we always use the stairs.

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A pengiuin walked into a bar. Just kidding, it waddled at an increasingly fast rate.

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Lance Armstrong gets on a bike

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if you write treehouse backwards it spells gullible.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Q /why do people eat dinner? A/ because their hungry

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want to hear a joke? then go ask someone else i dont know any.

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What's black and white and in the desert? Tourists being held hostage by a tribe.

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What's even better than finding 10 bucks in your pocket? Getting into heaven.

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why wont chin ever take his hat off because his head will be cold

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall Humpty Dumpty is an egg so nobody cares

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Whats the difference between Obama and Hitler? One is the President of the United States The other is a fascist dictator that killed millions.

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Boy: Hey girl if I had hand-cuffs, I’d lock myself to you right now! Girl: I would find that extremely creepy.

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Nock nock Who's there K K who? You forgot the K

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't.

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what is the opposite of underpants? overpants

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what did Russell wilson get for Christmas a seahawk..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


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