Why did the genie not grant the man his 3 wishes? Genies don't exist, only vampires live in lamps.

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Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

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why did the chicken cross the road i hate it when people ask questions they already know the answer to

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Why do turtles walk slow? They are physically incapable of walking fast.

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MATH: if for every 1 minute for billy is 5 minutes and every 5 minutes is an hour than billy is on acid and needs to come down.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Shit on her face

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A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

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Q: What did the fish say when it swam into a concrete wall? A: Fish don't have vocal cords that allow them to speak in a way discernable by humans, and if they did, it would just sound garbled and bubbly due to their being underwater.

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One time, I saw this guy on stilts and thought it would be hilarious if someone pushed him over. Then some guy pushed him over and broke his neck.

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What happened to the guy who drank poison? he died.

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Why couldnt Helen Keller drive? Because She was Blind you sexist asshole

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What's dark, has an opening, and guys like to go in it. A cave

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Why did the chicken cross the road? after approximately 10 seconds of looking back and forth left to right the chicken finally came to a realization that the road is clear and safe to cross.

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Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

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Whats the difference between a girl and a guy? one receives and one delivers.

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what do you call a muslim flying a plane a pilot

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a piece of string walks into a bar and the bartender says “sorry we dont serve your kind here” so the string goes outside twists himself round and ruffles up one of his ends then walks back into the bar, the bartender says “aren’t you the piece of string i just kicked out?” the string then replies “i’m a frayed knot”

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was heading to the funeral house to mourn his dead family.

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man walks into a bar his lack of awareness means that he didnt notice the maintenance sign in front of him he falls in a 200foot deep hole and dies.

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What do Selena and Justin, Kate and William, and Barack and Michelle all have in common? Nothing.

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Massie is a fatass

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:O <===============3 :===========3 :======3 :===3 :3 It all makes sense now.

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why did reed eat a fish? He had cancer of the testicles

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There's two Cherys in a bath one chery asks the other one to pass the soap the other chery said what do I look like, a typewriter?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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