A captain crashes his boat into a rock. He has the option to save to save his wife or his best friend. He saves neither and drowns.

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Why was the baby crying? He saw a nigga

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What's the difference between two elephants? One is dead.

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Roses are red Pickles are green I leik ur legs and whats inbetween

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What happened to the man who jumped off a plane while riding a donkey? He died.

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pickles are green infection is yellow all the girls i know call me a good fellow

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Yo mamma is so ugly, but your father was willing to look past that. They fell in love and you were born about a year after they got married.

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What did the man do when he found a lost dog in his yard? He shot it. This was a very old, lonely, and distressed man with many unresolved problems resulting from his childhood in poverty.

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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whats worse than one bee sting? two bee stings whats worse than two bee stings? the halocaust whats worse than the halocaust? three bee stings

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A farmer and his son were walking to the well to fetch some water. The farmer stops, turns to his son and is mauled to death by a lion because they were in Africa.

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What's worst than your computer breaking? Your face

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Stop screaming! The damn uppercase letters make my head hurt! Let a lady have it for once!

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Q: Why does a zebra have stripes? A: Because Sarah Jessica Parker is a horse.

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How does Fred drink his milk? -computer

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your so homosexual you go to a gay bar every couple of weeks so you get the social acceptance you need.

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once, my friend said hi. i said hi back

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Why was the hiker upset? He was plummeting 1,500 feet to the ground after tripping on a rock too close to a cliff.

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Help me I need to know how to cook a human fetus by tomorrow does anyone know any good recipes?

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Two muffins in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says nothing, because muffins cannot talk.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He had no conscience and therefore was not able to backup the very reason that he crossed the road.

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Why is Evan short? He was born that way.

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Rachel: Wanna hear a conundrum? Robby: Sure! Racheal: Vampire Value card.

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A man walks into a bar. He has a serious drinking problem and is destroying his life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops