What did the cow say to the other cow? "Baaa", he had an identity crisis.

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Yo momma so stupid she threw a rock at the ground And missed.

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Linda: See that rainbow? Isn't it beautiful? Bart: I'm color blind.... Linda: Well...this is awkward...

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titanic vs 9/11 who would win? Well the titanic backwards is a ship which saves lives and 9/11 backwards is a building on fire spitting out airplanes

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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KANE TUCKER HAS A CHODE THE SIZE OF HIS FINGER NAIL

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Why did the man go to Jupiter? Because he was on a classified space mission for N.A.S.A.

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Why is the young Chinese boy crying? Because he is being raped.

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An optimistic person says the glass is half full Pessimistic people say the glass is half empty Engineers say the glass is 2 times the size it needs to be.

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SEX IS LIKE MATH ADD THE BED SUBTRACT THECLOTHES DIVIDE THE LEGS AND PRAY U DONT MULTIPLY!!!!

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her with a knife.

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Have you seen Stevie Wanders new house? No. Neither has he.

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If people are freaking out about this Kony guy I cant wiat to see the look on their faces when they check in my crawl space.

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What's wore then finding a worm in your apple? Being the only person to survive a plane crash over Alaska, then having to eat your family in order to stay alive waiting for help to come.

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if you have 5 oranges and 15 ice cubes, how many pancakes can you fit on the roof? red, because aliens dont wear shirts.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? Both your parents are dead John.

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Three blondes walk into a bar...and have a nice evening, until one of them pulls out a gun and murders everyone at the bar, i think she was schizophrenic or something.

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Q: What's white, is Mel Gibson, and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree? A: Mel Gibson.

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What is funnier than Miley Cirus getting a Record Album? Justin Bieber's voice.

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What color is the grass on Bob's lawn? Bob lives in a apartment.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Boo Boo Who? Boo Smith

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What did the biscuit say when he saw his friend get run over? Oh my god. Dave, are you ok? Somebody call an ambulance.

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There once was an old lady who lived in a shoe. She had so many children, her vagina fell off.

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Why didn't the woman need a watch? Because she had both her hands amputated after battling diabetes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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