What is green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? An elephant I lied!

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A man walks into a bar so how many Jews were there when a man called Wellard ate a pizza. Balloons

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Why is a bird when it flies? Because the higher it goes the much.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What did the little boy ask for for Christmas? A new brain, as he has a malignant tumor, he died.

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Q: What would have been the easiest way to stop the second world war without killing anyone? A: Paid Hitler for his art.

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roses are read, violets are blue. i have alzheimers and Jill came tumbling down.

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*The doctor walks in* Knock knock. Whos there? Doctor. Doctor Who?

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Multi Orgasmic Pillow screechers

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Did you hear about the three Arabs that hijacked a plane? They drove it into the Pentagon.

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Whats green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 7

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I walk into a bar...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know you have to ask the chicken if you speak chicken

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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What did the bird say to the other bird? Nothing because birds can't talk.

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What do black people and bananas have in common? 50% of their DNA

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Why didn't Joe catch the baseball? He got shot by a local gang.

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Roeses are purple violets are green WTF u just stabbed me.

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Awesome! I've just received my giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us << Awesome! I've just received my giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us << Awesome! I've just received my giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <<

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Q. Why was the Asian boy crying A. Because i stabbed his family

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What's green and fuzy and could kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table

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a man ran into a bar screaming. he now has a severe coma

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whats red and bad for your teeth... A brick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops