My girlfriend is getting an abortion tonight. Its a surprise.

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why did the pancake eat a spanish holiday? Because a plane crashed into his condominium

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What did the coin said when it got flipped ? Nothing, coins do not have sufficient requirements to be able to talk like we humans do.

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Q. What's worst than getting kicked in the balls ? A. The holacaust

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5 blondes walk into a bar They all leave very intoxicated and die in a car accident shortly after.

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Why did women scream loudly!? As the women was unexpectadly frightend!

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what do you call when a penis is inside a vagina? sex

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What's the difference between a baby and a tea bag? Tea bags don't scream when I dip them in boiling water

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Knock knock! Who's there? A doorbell-salesman

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So you are a giggler huh? You ticklish too? Anyway, you ever watched Deathnote? I was gonna ask something kinda important but it disappeared, so you tell me stuff first. Oh, my parents? Well, they where nice and sweet, but lets talk about something cruel and horrible. (If you switch up nice and sweet with cruel and horrible and the opposite, you will get the picture I am trying to pain here) What makes me so much more interesting huh? And why are you afraid you may look like an Alien? HEEEEEY! I am a legal citizen and I am not freaking Mexican!

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What's brown and sticky? Vomit.

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Q: Why did the man have sex with Amanda Seyfried? A: Are you kidding me?

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Get out".

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What do you get when you put a woman in a room with 4 guys? She gets Gang Banged.

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What do you do when you see someone from the kkk? Accept what you saw and move on with your day

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how do you make a plumber cry?.... kill his family

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A skeleton walks into a bar, asks for a mug of beer and a washcloth.

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A teenager decides to stay home instead of go to college. His parents are fine with his choice since he is mentally ill.

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A chink walks into a bar. She is spotted by the secret police and instantly deported. Vote UKIP

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What did the coney say to the hotdog? At least i kill people.

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knock knock , who is there the postman the postman who ? the postman who is gonna give you a bill !

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What is it too late to do? Apologize...

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The lion swallowed his pride.

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Dumbledore dies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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