Q: Why did the mom try to wake up a sleeping bag? A: Because it's morning and her kid is curled up inside fast asleep

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Why don't pineapples grow on pine trees? Because they're tropical.

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what are you your not a human? are you an other?

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A German, an Irishman, a Mexican and a Texan are flying together on an airplane over the ocean. When the plane begins to experience engine trouble, they find that there is only one parachute for the four of them! Through an amazing display of flying skill, however, the pilot is able to complete the flight and land safely.

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Justin beiber..

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Whats so funny about the women bringing fast food home for her family? Nothing shes a single mother who does'nt have time to make food between her two jobs.

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Suicide is never funny Unless it's a clown

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A man stops another man on the street in Manhattan and asks "How do I get to Carnegie Hall ?" The other man gives him direction, including which subway stop to get off at.

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What did the monkey say to the lion? I'm being sexually abused by my handler, and feel so violated.

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Nerve endings. Now, lets say we make that sensation of a finger down there vibrate, as your nose (not not your lower parts no no) become twenty times as sensitive, now you are just rubbing your nose right? Try not rubbing it completely off now...

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what are you mike bibby?

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What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

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Whats sadder than 20 dead babies nailed to a tree? The Parents...

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What do stupid fat ugly women always say to me? “I think you have a problem with women.”

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yo mamma's so retarded that shes a potato

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What's worse than a dead baby? A baby.

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Why did the police officer shoot the man in the wheelchair? Says the police: "He was running"

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Albert your flies undone.

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why did the man go to prison? he was a serial rapist.

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WHY WAS 6 AFRAID OF 7? I REALLY DONT KNOW!

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What is the difference between a baby and a tree? Its not illegal to hit one with an axe

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What do you call John Lennon without glasses? A skeleton, because John Lennon is dead.

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman went to the top of the Empire State building to have a penis measuring contest. The Irishman had the longest penis.

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What's the first thing that goes through a persons mind when they get shot in the head. The bullet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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