How many chinese women can you fit in a car? About the same amount as men.

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Q: What's long, hard, and full of sea men? A: A submarine.

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Q: Why did the blonde stare at the can of frozen orange juice for two hours? A: Because she was dead.

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Why did the man feel like he was flying? Because he had just committed suicide by jumping off of a tall building.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar and the bartender says, " OH MY GOD! YOU CAN WALK?!?!"

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Person 1: Ask me if i'm a tree Person 2: Are you a tree? Person 1: No

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

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How do you convince a therapist that he is crazy? Hide in a fortress made of sporks wearing nothing but a belt, and start hissing and throwing paint at him repeatedly.

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Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is to sparsely populated and not economically viable.

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A Hispanic, Jew and black man walk into a bar. The bartender tells them to get out because he's closed.

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Yesterday I saw a black kid outrun a white kid know why? Because the white kid was a cripple

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How you know that you are flying with a "no frills" airline? There are no meals or films provided, no orange juice to drink during ascent and descent and no mid-flight shop service.

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A White, a Mexican, and a Chinese guy all take a boat to go exploring.

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What do you call a horny horse? A unicorn.

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why does her hair shine so nicely? she uses good shampoo.

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What does the composer Berg lack? Schoen.

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A man walks into me and I say: "WATCH IT PUNK!"

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I like your words "He without an equal, also stands alone was it?"

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Q. How did the man with no legs get to places? A. He didn't, he died at his house alone

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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what's worse than being hiv+? having full blown aids.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Why are VIOLETS blue?

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How many dead babies does it take to fill a bathtub? 17

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Relax and enjoy sugartits, you see, I left a last chance for you to shut down the function yourself, when you really want to end it sugartits, you can just read and focus on what I am calling you, sugartits, it really insulted you at first sugartits, but do you see it? Have a nice night sugartits, I mean I sleep like half a hour luckily because of hypnosis and the time control and you know stuff that sounds like its from Sonic or you sugartits. But I gotta go dear sugartits, you want to hypnosis to end, you make it happen by focusing on what I am calling you here.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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