What's moist wet and I put my finger in it? My nose.

A man walks into a bar gets drunk gets in his car and has a terrible crash because he was to intoxicated the end.

Oh because you have Lou Gehrigs Disease

Three women are seen walking while having ice cream. One of them is licking the ice cream. Another is sucking the ice cream, and the other one is biting the ice cream. One of these women is married. Which one is married? The one that has a wedding ring on her finger.

what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? rape

what better than getting an F on a test? getting an A on a test.

Q: What do you get when you put a boy and a girl together in a locked room? A: Blood and gore.

your mom is so nasty that when she took a shower and acquired general etiquette, she became possibly more respectable

A duck walks into a bar and the bartender--TOAST

what will you do if you become a ruler of the world? Waking up, its just a dream GET REAL!

Knock Knock? Who's There? The Gestapo.

Roses are red Violets are blue Your mom likes dick and so do you

what do you do if you get in a car wreck with a black man get out of your vehicle and exchange insurance information

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

Twelve people are in a plane. One of them says: "Man, we really are not so many in this plane" Another one replies: "It's because it's a 12 seats plane." Another says: "Do 12 seats planes even exist?" Another one answers: "Of course they do." Another person says: "Guys, are we even flying?" Someone says: "I don't know" Another says: "Yes, we're flying, look out the window." Another says: "I have cancer." Someone reacts: "Oh, I'm really sorry for you" Another: "Yes, me too" Someone adds: "It's really terrible" Another says: "Has science made any progress recently?" The plane crashes.

The speeding car skidded on the rain-slicked roadway. Beyond the outside of the curve was a 100 meter drop-off. As the car slid toward the edge of the road, the driver and passenger both had a sick feeling in the pit of their stomach and wished they hadn't ordered vinegar milkshakes, the special of the day at Pickle Shack. Or it could have been the toadstools, but it didn't matter now.

When Chuck Norris dives into a pool... he gets wet due to the aqueous nature of the water

why shouldn't you hit a black guy on a bike? Cause violence is against the law

If you give a hobo a stick he might poke u with it

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Why was the man "hanging around"? He committed suicide.

a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

You want to know how I got these scars? A horrible knife throwing accident.

Knock knock? Who's there? John. John who? John who is hospitalized in critical condition because he was struck by a ladder.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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