- Anti Joke

whats white a smells like paint. whtie paint.

What do you call an Interlochen Arts Academy Student with no talent? A comparative artist

Q.What happens when Torres scores A. He doesn't

It's weird how two of the SAME jokes can get different ratings.

Knock Knock Who's There? Im Black Im Black Who Open The Door Now Pancakes Granted

What does the Post Office have in common with a shoe store? Both provide goods and services in exchange for money.

Yo mama so fat.

there was a little girl walking through a park. then she was kidnapped and most likely raped and sold to a foreign country.

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Jimmy comes home from school one day and goes to his mother. "Mommy, guess what?" "What?" "I had sex with my teacher today!" Naturally after hearing such news the mother gets appalled and tells her husband. "Well, that's my boy" he says "Now that your a man Jimmy we're going to go out and get some drinks tonight be ready in a half an hour." So they arrive at the local bar "Wait here son, you can sit down and save us a table and I'll go get the drinks ok?" "No dad I think I'll stand" "..why? What's the matter son?" "My butt hurts"

Why did the child with one arm shave his head? He is a swimmer.

How many Jews can you fit in a Car? 2 in the front seat 3 in the back seat 5 in the trunk and a couple thousand in the Ashtray -WSS Gaming

A teacher, a consturction worker, and an army general are on an airplane. The pilot tells them the plane has too much weight, and if they don't each drop one item then the plane will crash. Realizing one item each is obviously not enough weight to throw off, the teacher and the construction worker team up and throw the army genral off the plane. They land safely, and live the rest of their life haunted by their vile actions.

two elephants in a bathtub Elephant 1: pass me the soap Elephant 2: no, radio!

what smells like diarrhea and looks like diarrhea? diarrhea stupid

What's beneath Chuck Norris's beard? A chin I presume, as that is what most humans have under their beards. Chuck Norris is a human and therefore is likely to have a chin. This is all based on the assumption that he is a human, because of the many characteristics he has shown that are humanlike.

A guy walks into a bar carrying an octopus under his arm. The bartender asks him, "say, buddy, what's with the octopus?" and the man replies, "this is the most intelligent octopus in the world. In fact, I bet you $100 that it can play any instrument you give it." The bartender snickers at the other patrons, and puts $100 on the bar. He motions the man over to the piano by the wall. The man puts the octopus on the piano, but it nothing happens. The octopus is dead, because it's been out of the water for a while. The bartender looks at the man sadly, as two psychiatric orderlies from the local mental hospital take the visitor away to the looney bin, after another patron called the police. The bartender never gets his $100, and now he has to clean up the godawful mess on his piano.

What is the difference between a snail and whale? A loaf of bread

. HAHAHAHA I have control of you I don't enjoy that picture.

What did the old man get for Christmas? He forgot because he has alzheimer's

Three couples went in to see the minister to see how to become members of his church. The minister said that they would have to go without sex for two weeks and then come back and tell him how it went. The first couple was retired, the second couple was middle-aged and the final couple was newlywed. Two weeks went by, and the couples returned to the minister. The retired couple said it was no problem at all. The middle-aged couple said it was tough for the first week, but after that, it was no problem. The newlyweds said it was fine until she dropped the can of paint. "Can of PAINT!" exclaimed the minister. "Yeah," said the newlywed man. "She dropped the can and when she bent over to pick it up I had to have her right there and then. Lust took over." The minister just shook his head and said that they were not welcome in the church. "That's okay," said the man. "We're not welcome in Home Depot either."

Three Men walk into a bar. One with a ax and one with a Shovel. The other one isn't holding anything. Boom (\ _ /) (x . x)

Roeses Are Red Violets Are Blue He's The One For Me And Not For You, And If You Try To Take My Place I Will Take My Fist And Smash Your Face(:

life is like a box of chocolates... it doesnt last long for fat peopl

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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