Great ideas: Go to your facebook account and type in: Man, I am gonna suicide right now, bye! Moral: Now if you do it as well, nah, dont do it, seriously... Just type it!

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roses are red tulips are too, violets are violet, not freaking blue.

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An artist walks into a bar and orders a rum and ckoe. The bartender reads the first sentence and realizes the artist is dyslexic and fixes him a rum and coke.

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Why did the cop hate black people? He was a racist.

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Poker face

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What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

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how do you stop a baby from crying? hit it with a brick.

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When Michael Jackson was in a dark tunnel, it didn't work when he turned his flashlight. How come? A: Because it was out of battery

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How many fish does it take to brush their teeth? Jp's worth of fish isn't enough.

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What's worse than being dead? Nothing.

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Connor is homo

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George Washington delivered a short speech to his troops before they crossed the delaware river. Here it is: "Get in the boat."

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I once walked into my grandmas house to find her laying face down on the ground. It turns out that everyone was planking but grandma wasn't breathing...

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i have a pet duck, when i take it a bath i use cold water, if i use hot water it and i drop a carrot in the tub it will think im cooking it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who let the chickens out?!

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When is a Jew the sleepiest? Depends on the time really... some people sleep and wake up on different biological calendars.

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Why doesn't Harry have any arms? Because he's a Jew.

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A piece of paper got wet. I stuck it over the fireplace to dry off, but it lit on fire.

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Roses are *yanks hair* Violets are *yanks hair* *sobs and yanks hair* I have tricolomania

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You know what isn't funny? Getting punched in the face. You know what is funny? Brittany Spears getting punched in the face.

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Woman: do u want to watch Snakes on a Plane? Man: sure, what is it about? Woman: It's about a horse on a boat

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What do you get when you cross a hamster with a zebra? A genetic abomination that you should put out of it's misery.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilate was a loaf of bread.

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whats the difference between a black guy and a park bench? well a park bench is an inanimate object that people use to sit on and feed the birds at the park. and a black guy is a living being who is looked down upon in society.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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