What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? - "Where's my tractor?"

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Whats the difference between a lamp and Morgan Freeman? Alot

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What did the lawyer say to the lawyer We are both lawyers

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Knock knock. Who's there?

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Why was Rosa Parks forced to sit in the back of the bus? Rebecca Black decided to sit in the front.

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Today i decided to burn calories, so I grabbed my lighter from the counter and put it in my pocket and proceeded to the treadmill.

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What happened when the Neo-Nazi ran into a group of black people? He listened to their struggles, heard their stories, accepted their diversity and eventually hung up his hateful ways.

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why did the man get a divorce? Because his wife had an affair.

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What's bigger than China and Smaller than my penis? Russia and a smaller penis.

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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Two scientists walk into a bar, the pair walk up to the counter and the first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have some H2O too." 10 minutes later, the second scientist dies.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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q ggggggggggggggggg

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she couldn't afford one.

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How do you kill a blonde? There are a variety of methods, but I prefer a fine mix of insecure clowns and pepto-bismol.

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What lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japanese People

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What do you call a green blur in the sky? Super pickle?

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rose are red violets should be purple

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i'm filthy rich literally because money is dirty

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A Jew and a German meet by chance in a bar. They exchange pleasantries and order drinks. At the end of the evening they leave, having made a friend.

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What does an Irishman say to you in the morning? Nothing because you only speak French.

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What did the guy say before he learned how to Dougie? Teach me how to Dougie

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Boo Radley, I live next door.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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