- Anti Joke

Once upon a time, there was an ugly duckling. All the other ducklings made fun of the ugly duckling for being so ugly, and the little duckling felt bad. "Why do I have to be such an ugly duckling?," he asked. However one day, the duckling grew up and became........well, an ugly duck. Turns out he was just an ugly duck. The end.

What happens to the yellow hat when it is thrown into the red sea? It get's wet.

Knock-knock jokes with sjws: Knock knock! Who's there? A transgender! A transgender who? WOW. It's 2016, people. If you can't recognize a transgender, you're a disgusting piece of cis white male scum! OH! OHH! "I'm sorry lady"? Do I LOOK like a lady to you? I'm a- no- sir- stop interrupting me. SIR! I identify as a gender fluid demisexual! "What does that matter?" Oh my god. Well it wouldn't matter if I identified as a goddamn piece of salami to you would it??? Huh? I'm confusing you? WOW! What a priveleged- oh! So I'M being rude? OKAY! FINE! I'm recording this you know. You're going ALL over the Internet. Oh yes you are! No, hey, my privilege cam! You just took it this is rape! You are assaulting me! Don't just shove it back into my hands like that! I call patriarchy! Oh no, I'm not done with you! Don't you close that door you Goddamn piece of sh- slam

What's the difference between Jesus and a painting? It only takes one nail to hang up a painting.

How do you fit an elephant into a car? You can't. Unless it's a baby elephant. You would probably also need a convertible with the top down.

I told my two lesbian friends I wanted to join them. I am a priest in a Gay Marriage friendly state and they are happily married.

A man walks into a bar later at night & the bartender says how was your day the man replies "well I found out my mom is a raging crack addict, my grampa has alzheimer's & i have terminal cancer" how was yours the bartender says "I found out im Hitlers lost son".

Why did Biggie Smalls eat so much dark chocolate? His doctor suggest that he eat foods high in fiber.

Boy: "But I don't wanna visit Grandma!" Mother: "Shut up and keep digging."

What do u call a man who sells hot dogs on the street? A Mexican

What did the doctor say to the obese person? You have diabetes.

A train conducter conducts goes at 60mph, when he goes under a bridge he goes at 52mph. When he goes over a hill he goes at 47mph. If he goes under 3 bridges and over 6 hills what did the conductors mother eat for dinner that night. Nothing, after many months of suffering she died from Huntington's disease.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Why was Johnny so sad His father beat his mother

Q: What do you call a black man's car being egged? A: A Hate Crime

Why did John McCain lose the election? He did not get as many votes as Barack Obama.

Why were accents created? So when people go to Texas they come back sounding like a D-Bag.

Why did the witch stay up all night with a broken broomstick? Because she couldn't sweep.

a man walks into the bar and gets knocked out

what has wheels and drives? a boat i lied about the wheels

How did the baby cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken

How did the Jewish man play racquetball? With a racket and a birdie.

What's black and white and red all over? A black, white, and red shirt.

How does an elephant climb a cliff who cares

A man walked into a bar. He then sat down and ordered a drink.