How do you kill a zombie? You don't. Zombies aren't real.

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What did the strawberry say to the strawberry? Nothing because strawberries are fruit and can't talk

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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? No, but considering there has not been a single man to walk on the moon since 1972, it'd be difficult to generate any kind of revenue on this natural satellite.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chipmunk fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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Shaving your balls is just plain nuts!

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Why did the little boy ride his bike to school? It was a birthday present.

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Where did Susie go during the explosion? On her knees to catch it.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

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What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education (and quite possibly from acquaintances or family members within the company that employs him, though it is often considered impolite to mention this latter fact, as it may be construed to denigrate the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study).

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What do you call a black man reading a book? An avid reader that happens to be black

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What did the black man in a white van get when he went over the speed limit? A speeding ticket

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what ddo you call someone that has a small dick benjamin

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A Stick!

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why are jews so cash hungry? because like the rest of us they are looking for a way to survive and feed their family.

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Two cows in a field one says Moo the other says, Moo

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What do you call a dog with no wings? A dog

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Who has big muscles and is good at wrestling? A wrestler

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what did jake say to the priest? hmmm, salty

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A black man, a jew and a muslim walk into a bar. ... I forgot what happens next, so let's just say they have a good time and get back home safely.

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Whats black and blue and doesnt bruise? a bruise.

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knock knock Who's there? Me Me who? Me Doa Kong Oh, Hi! Come on in.

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I read my Uncle an anti-joke. He is still wondering why it made no sense to him.

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What do a goat and an eagle have in common? They both can fly, except for the goat.

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What did the farmer say when the potatoes were ready for harvest? The potatoes are ready for harvest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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