What is black and white and red all over? A pile of dead, bleeding, mixed race babies.

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"knock knock" "whos there?" "pizza delivery!"

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What do you call a person in a morgue? Dead.

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Why did Jessy crawl to her bed? Because she has no legs.

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Why was Carlos fired? Because he stole and smelled of weed.

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How many babies can you breast feed? 2

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Whats the defination of cruelty

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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what do you call a woman that didnt make you a sandwich? An ambulance

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Jeff: Did you know, someone called you an owl? Billy: Who?

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What's worst than dropping your watch into the gutter? Waking up with a penis on your head.

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Where can I apply for janitor school?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it was wandering and had no idea wht it was doing because it has very little mental capacity whatsoever

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Hey! What dhujv hushichk jgdwrggy man? Go home Sally, you're drunk

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What did the blind pole vaulter say to the speed skater? Hi, how are you?

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock, knock Who's there? Not Susie

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What is the difference between a black man and a potato? Well, there are a great many differences. But the main one is probably that a potato is a potato, and a black man is a black man.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Your momma's so fat that when she uses a hoolahoop, she cant use it, she is fat.

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why did your mom make food to feed the killweeds.

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How long does it take to microwave a baby? I don't know, I was to busy masterbating. GBW

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What did the smoker say when he coughed? Ohhh dam it's turned into a smokers cough

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because six cheated on seven and slept with nine.

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops