What would happen if you insulted Chuck Norris' mother? Considering you did it on a messageboard that only unemployed people with no social lives use, nothing.

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How many amish people does it take to screw in a light blub? None as the amish don't require artificial light

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How many jews can you fit into an ash-tray? none because the volume of a human is much greater than an any ash-tray

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when life gives you lemons... squeeze the juice into your eyes.

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hey girl, My Gyarados is BIG enough for you to ride it ALL day and night

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Did you hear about the young couple that confused K-Y jelly with window caulking? All their windows fell out.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Me.

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Roses are red, Bacon is also red. Poems are hard, Bacon.

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What did the dubstep say? Wub.

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A man gets shot in the balls by a huge swarm of bees HE IS VERY NICE AND FILLED WITH RICE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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A black man breaks into a car, he doesn't steal anything because that would a violation of the car owner's privacy.

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Knock knock. Who's there?

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Oh you have herpes? yeah, there's an app for that.

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Why did the hobo get hit by a bus? He wanted to kill himself.

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Did you see my sandwitch? No. I am your sandwitch, and therefore no one thought to put me up to a mirror. Would you like me to? No. I have no eyes. And why are you talking to a sandwitch??? ...

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What do Michael Jackson and a T-Rex have in common? They're both dead.

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An insane individual walks into a bank and asks for $500. The teller refuses since he doesn't have an account, so the individual pulls out a gun and asks the teller again. The teller presses the silent panic button, causing the cops to show up and arrest the gunman, but not before he manages to shoot the teller and the small child standing next two counters over.

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three mexicans walk into a bar... the bartender says get the fuck out!

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What's the difference between zev hatis and a dwarf Nothing. They are both midgets and are going to die by the age of 25

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What did the blonde waitress say to the man with a curly moustache? Good evening, are you ready to order?; yes [x2]; and what would you like with it?; certanly; there you go; no, I'm sorry; right.

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What's the easiest way to become filthy rich? There are many ways to earn money. Invest some time into researching the topic.

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A guy walks into a bar and says, "I'm Japanese". The guy at the counter says "What a coincidence! I am Japanese too." He gets seated and the guy next to him says, "I'm Japanese too." The bar is in Japan.

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Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John, your son. Now open the door.

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What do tomatoes, apples, oranges, lemons, and peaches have in common? They are all fruits.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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