Why the hell does my sister shower in a swimsuit every time? Its not as if anyone is looking! ALRIGHT! ONCE ALRIGHT? ONLY ONCE! But then she hears the sound of my zipper ONCE and the shit hits the fan! Which is weird, yeah suuure she hears it when I pull it up, but when I pull it down and stroke it and moan? Nada!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's black, brown and red? My dog as a serial killer

thumb_up thumb_down -22

In an apartment complex, a black family lived on the first floor, a mexican family lived on the second floor, and a white family lived on the third floor. Suddenly, at about noon on tuseday, a giant tornado came through town and took out the entire complex, destroying everything. Why did only the white familey survive the catastophy? Because both parents were at work and the kids were in school.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -22

If a plane crashes on the boarder of Canada and The U.S.A- Where would they burry the survivors.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

what is worse than falling off a bridge? .. getting pushed off a bridge

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's the difference between toilet paper and a shower curtain? So YOU'RE the one!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the chicken cross the road? His whole family killed themselves.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q: What did little Timmy get from his mother this Christmas? A: The contents of her will.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Knock Knock Who's there? (Pause) Who's there? Hello? Bloody kids

thumb_up thumb_down -22

knock knock whos there haha this is a shit joke anyone that reads this is a jimmy saville follower and got fingered up the bum hole violently by him love you

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you call a black kid with no parents? A black orphan.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Whats worse then a worm in your apple...... some of these jokes

thumb_up thumb_down -22

An irishman walks into a bar and stays there until he goes home.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Who's looking for judicial toenail clippings?

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Wanna have sex?

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Susan went to Chemistry class, Susan is no more. For what she thought was H20 was H2S04 (sulfuric acid.)

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why couldn't the towel talk? Because it didn't have a language.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

WILLY

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why does Eli Manning play for the Giants? Because he is huge.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

-What's funnier than a dog with no legs? -The movie Dumb and Dumber, in my opinion.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How do you eat a sandwich With yo mouth bi tch

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Q: knok knok A: Im home

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops