Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

Why does the Taliban forbid people from having sex standing up? It might lead to dancing. And then, of course, death.

What did the dog say to the other dog? Woof.

38 studio's new game... Finance City

I like it, I like it becuase it is cream

How do you teach an old dog a new trick? Answer: You can't

Justin Bieber tries to get into a club but is not allowed because he is to young.

whats funnier than a banana an orange -may bieber

Two muffins are sitting in an oven they say nothing to eachother because they are muffins and cannot speak if they did they would most likely be taken by the US government and studied and assumed to be alien life forms but anyway the muffins were taken out later and presumably eaten

Person 1 - Have you heard about the movie about constipation? Person 2 - No. Person 1 - It hasn't come out yet

When is a door not a door? When your burns down.

a duck walks onto a basketball court during a game. The referee sees the bird and blows his whistle crying fowl just as the player was running up to dunk. The confused bird flies away and the referee gets punched by the angry player.

How many jews can you fit in a car? As many as the compacity of the car can hold and how big the jews are

Knock Knock Who's there? I said who's there? The man opens the door to find there was no one there and begins to shake in fear as his schizophrenia is getting worse.

Knock Knock Who's There? Jehovah's Witness

what did the deaf guy say when the poor man asked how life was? the deaf guy didn't respond considering the fact that he was deaf and would never interact with a poor man.

I know how to make a brilliant telescope out of an empty jar, some leather, a string and a brilliant telescope.

Why do alcoholics use brown bags? Because they are ashamed of what they have become and seek to repress their guilt by entering into denial.

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Matters the size of the bathtub and the size of the babies.

Where did Mary go when the bomb blew up? Everywhere.

what did the tree say to the person? nothing trees cant talk

How do you confuse a black man? Call him from a blocked number and I say "I love you"

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Blond answers: Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat............?

Knock Knock Who's there A girl scout want to buy some cookies to raise money for my cardiac surgery?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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