Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares, it's a chicken.

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A man is hungry so he gets on his coat and shouts : "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!". His wife says not to because the police say the rapist 'Eggman' is out again. He says he will be very careful. On his way he hears 'They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggmen-" and the man shouts: "AND I AM THE WAlRUS, SO GET THE HECK OUTTA MY FACE OR I WILL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" The Eggman and the man found two more people from Liverpool and formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band broke up.

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why did the girl cry while watching starwars? She was being raped

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Man I'm Bored Nice to meet you.

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what"s short , has a tail , and is amazing ? maddy cartwright i lied about the tail!

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ermm Hello ? what about me says rishi with a tear down his eye

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what did the man say to the sad woman? go make ma a sammich before i hit you again! the women refused and was hit again.

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why did jenny get 22 turnovers in a basketball game? because jenny has down syndrome

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Knock Knock Who's there? I eat mop I eat mop who? That's strange, most American's don't eat poo I'm Asian

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Why did the man with brain cancer die? He drove his Segway off a cliff.

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So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

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Two tomatoes were crossing a road when one of them got hit by a truck. The other said, Carrot.

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What do you call a jewish womans boobs? JUBES!

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Why was the boy dead? The boy was hit by a bus ran over by a train and stabbed to death by a murderer then put into a grinder for a meal for the murderer.

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So a man walks into a hospital to see his dying wife..... walks into her room falls over and then dies

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LISTEN UP PEEPS, I'M GOING TO SHOW YOU MY PASSWORD.. just as shown on screen THIS IS IT: ******* YEP just as shown on screen

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PICKLES

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Suzie.

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How many babies can you fit on a ferris wheel? None, babies aren't allowed to ride

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What's green, three feet tall, and can live forever? Definitely not Julie Andrews.

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women's rights

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How do you get a Mexicans attention? By calling him by his name.

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The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

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*see an orphan* Knock knock Whos there Not you parents ...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops