What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? A read along book

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why couldnt the polish people live in the outhouse? because the mexicans in the basement were too noisy

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What is the most hardest math known to man kind? 1+1=?

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What's white, black and tan? The people of planet earth.

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What did Adam say when he saw Eve with just a fig leaf? The recipe said three frikkin figs.what the hell am I going to do with a fig leaf, you better get back in there, and hurry because I'm double parked. I was referring to Eastend married couple Adam and Eve Turner, in case there was any confusion.

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What did the cat say to the cat? Miau

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Why are women always wrong? Well, depending on the factors of IQ of said women, location and date, said time period of always can be deemed in every circumstance as incorrect to say the least, and derogatory. These days said derogatory actions are punishable by law.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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An Australian man walking in Manhattan is approached by another man who pulls out a switchblade and says, "give me your wallet or I'll stab you with this knife!" The Australian man hands over his wallet. A nearby police officer witnesses this the last moment of the mugging, arrests the criminal and returns the Australian's belongings.

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That is a bad anti-joke down there | V

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One day there was 2 black guys in hoodys with knives in there hand. They tapped me on the shoulder and took my groceries. They then made me a jam sandwich and went on there way

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Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting mauled by a pack of hungry wolves

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one day a boy asked a Manican if it had a pulse it didn't

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There once was a man from Nantucket Who was stung on the head by a wasp When asked if it hurt he replied, 'not a bit, and he could do it again if he'd like to.'

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I saw GESUS and SHE's BLACK

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Why do the lesbians where pants? Because they are extremely comfourtable and the best for cold days

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because of excess velocity.

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knock knock Who's there? The Police! Your under arrest.

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What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I jack off

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What did the farmer say to the survivor of the plane crash that just crashed on his land? "Need a band-aid?"

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It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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I am aware that my positivity makes me do some bad mistakes, but if negativity is the alternative I will keep taking my chances.

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Do you knpow why Michael Jackson is not dead? Dumbass, he IS dead...

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Question what is blue and floats Answer everything that is blue that foes not sink

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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