What did Adam say when he saw Eve with just a fig leaf? The recipe said three frikkin figs.what the hell am I going to do with a fig leaf, you better get back in there, and hurry because I'm double parked. I was referring to Eastend married couple Adam and Eve Turner, in case there was any confusion.

Why are women always wrong? Well, depending on the factors of IQ of said women, location and date, said time period of always can be deemed in every circumstance as incorrect to say the least, and derogatory. These days said derogatory actions are punishable by law.

What is the most hardest math known to man kind? 1+1=?

What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

What's white, black and tan? The people of planet earth.

one day a boy asked a Manican if it had a pulse it didn't

Question what is blue and floats Answer everything that is blue that foes not sink

What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I jack off

I saw GESUS and SHE's BLACK

Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting mauled by a pack of hungry wolves

There once was a man from Nantucket Who was stung on the head by a wasp When asked if it hurt he replied, 'not a bit, and he could do it again if he'd like to.'

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because of excess velocity.

knock knock Who's there? The Police! Your under arrest.

I am aware that my positivity makes me do some bad mistakes, but if negativity is the alternative I will keep taking my chances.

Do you knpow why Michael Jackson is not dead? Dumbass, he IS dead...

Why do the lesbians where pants? Because they are extremely comfourtable and the best for cold days

What did the farmer say to the survivor of the plane crash that just crashed on his land? "Need a band-aid?"

One day there was 2 black guys in hoodys with knives in there hand. They tapped me on the shoulder and took my groceries. They then made me a jam sandwich and went on there way

Three girls are eating icecream one girl sucks on her icecream the second girl licks on her icecream and the third girl bites on her icecream. Q: Which of the three girls is married? A: The girl with the wedding ring.

why did sally drown cause she was black

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A1: he was shot. A2: he died A3: the forest was being cut down and he got into a machine and was shredded to pieces A4: he fell asleep

What's big, brown, and full of crap? A septic tank.

This is my fist. Would you politely run into it as fast as you can?

how do you make a plumber cry A: kill his family

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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