A cheetah walks into a bar. The bartender refuses to serve re cheetah, as cheetahs are an endangered species and does not want to risk the cheetah succumbing to alcohol poisoning.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you know if you are an alien? When you start maulesting sea creatures for their milk

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven three twelve. Am i doing it right?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: Why was the old man sad? A: Because he has a quarter super glued to the bottom of his foot

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the young boy get his Father for Father's Day? A bouquet of flowers for his grave stone.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Johnny Manziel is the best quarter ever (this isn't a joke just a true statement)

thumb_up thumb_down -8

a duck, a mexican, a camel, a jew, a duck, a moose, an asian, an ostrich, a turtle, an elephant, a scorpion, two vampires, a pokemon, your mom, Stephen Hawkings, a bird, a plane, mario, your family, and a plumber walk into a bar. They have cancer, AIDS, disabilties, diabetes, herpes, siezures, retardation, death in their families, drug addiction, no arms or legs, no home, no money, racial segregation, and have been raped. A combination of which is worse than the holocaust and three bee stings and a rope that fails.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

LOL we are spamming this site too much!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A: I accidentally shot my sister with a rifle! B: you don't have a sister? A: exactly

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How much is that doggie in the window? $4.95 + Shipping&Handling

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why did suzie fall off the swing? because she had no arms.. knock, knock who's there? not suzie

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? feel the other side of the worm in his mouth

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why are fish bad at basketball? Because they're afraid of the net...

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats the hardest thing to have sex with? a goldfish.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Jokes about the Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Lol, first of all all I watched was something called Chobits many years ago, and while I know what hentai is, I cant say I watch that a lot or not really at all no... A peek but, its just too weird for me, they all look like cute kids with deformed bodies or something. What? You into Nerds now? Why cant I just wear my contacts and look somewhat less alien?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why did jimmy loose the bike race. because he never entered.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why was the stone green? I dont know thats why im asking -_-

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the student get expelled from a Christian school? He continually beat other students between class periods.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats worse than burning your foot? Getting it eaten off by a cannibal.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you get a baby to stop crying Cut its head off

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: Whats the worst thing to drop in a prison shower? A: An exploding nail gun

thumb_up thumb_down -8

how do you turn your dishwasher into a garbage disposal? make her take out the trash.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops